"A New Beginning..."

Last night in this old house.
Been here for the better part of twenty years I guess.
Ya accumulate a lot of memories.
Now it's near bare & empty.
Truck is coming tomorrow to move the stuff up to Stephie's, and the cable, phone, and internet get turned off Monday.
If the past year wasn't hard enough...
the past two weeks were a true test on me.
Mom's passing, funeral arrangements, house packing & sifting thru years of possessions, keeping only the most important...
trashing stuff ya really don't want to.

Mom's memorial service was humble & small, but all the people that really mattered showed up. A day or so later, we took a trip down the Jersey shore to a place called Keansburg to spread her ashes like she wanted.
The night before it was morbidly comical as I sifted some of her remains into three tiny little Chinese vases for me and the girls to save as keepsakes.
Mom was all over the table, all over me, and even the cat was dancing in her ashes.
Something that might be gross to others... but that me and especially mom would find hysterical.

But a couple of days later after Mom's wake, I got a message from a buddy's brother saying to call him... it was "important".

My best friend Greg Guarinello dropped dead out of the blue.

I had talked to him the day Mom died after not speaking to him for a few weeks.
He had said he was having trouble breathing, and went for tests for his heart, but they came back negative.
But since he was a large guy, they hadda do some more.
He said he was taking it day to day, and possibly wouldn't attend Mom's wake.
Apparently while his wife was at work, he couldn't breath, called 911, and by the time they got there and broke down the door...
he was gone.
He was 53 years old.

We were "thick as thieves" and he was my buddy, confidant, graphics buddy, photography teacher, he shared my sense of humor... and we were gonna devise a business scheme gimmick to become rich together.

I'll miss him terribly...



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So the main thing keeping my sanity has been keeping busy lately.
Always one more thing to pack or throw out...
one more thing to add to an ever growing list of "Things To Do".
But I won't be leaving just yet.
Gonna stay till July to get my final affairs in order.
Gotta go for a few more doctor visits to get my clean bill of health, pay all the final bills, get my driver's license finally after a 20 year lapse, get my kitty Spooky settled in her new home, and make travel arrangements.
(Spooky was a real worry, but thank God my daughter's friend Misty is gonna take her.)
Thru all of the pandemonium... I thought I was gonna lose it a few times, and it seemed like a lot of things were gonna be near impossible to get done.
But I have a new sense of awe at just how wonderful the few friends and family that I have really are.
And I found out for sure, that you can muster up an great deal of strength during times of crisis when needed, and if I just get out of my own way and let it go and leave it up to God... things have an amazingly "magical" way of coming together.


It's gonna be scary to say the least starting fresh at 47 years old.
And it's gonna be culture shock for this Joisey tawkin' city boy movin' down to da land 'o cotton... Georgia.
But it's also kinda exciting, and the thought of it all keeps me going.
My daughter tells me the new house will be ready by summer, I have a vehicle waiting for me, and they just got me a queen sized bed.
They can help me get a civilian job on the air force base or elsewhere if I decide, include me on their military health insurance and I'll get to be with my new lil grandmonkey all the time.

Things are really cheap rentwise down there, and what goes for luxury condos up here renting for $2500. a month... they pay $800. bucks rent for down there...
a huge 2 BR, 2 bath place with new appliances, a pool, parking, gym, and gameroom.

Soon I'll be working and get my own little crib going down there for myself.
And the oppourtunities abound.
The graphics and web design market is kinda saturated up here, but down there not so much. And just the webpage design & photo restoration side businesses I have in mind alone can generate extra income.
I'm sure some rednecks will pay a a good buck for their old photos of Granny May Clampet to be restored, and to go hah tehhk wiff they vary owwwn webb saht.
(Sorry... just bein' a low down, no good, Noo Frickin' Yawk Yankee asshole there... southerners are actually kinda OK.)
But seriously... I think there's some possibilities there.

And truthfully, I'm getting to an age where after a day's work all I need is a fridge with some food, cable TV, and an internet connection.
With the help of God, I just may find me a little southern belle down thar.
And I love to drive, so when I need my "hustle & bustle, city & people fix"... I can always do a short roadtrip into Macon, Atlanta, or even Savannah.
Friends and family in Florida aren't too far either.
Though it's a bit on the hot side in summer, air conditioning suits me fine, and I really won't miss the snow a hell of a lot.
I can do Christmas visits in Joisey to see Stephie & friends, the snow and the Rockefeller Center tree, etc.

Anyhoo... I'm ramblin' on...
like da fine 'ol suthun' ramblin' man I'm about to become.

Time too reminisce a bit, take a last look around at what has always been home to me, spend one last night in this old house...
then I hit da road Jack.
I'm goin' "bye-byes"... big time.

Through all the pain of the past year,
the future is finally looking brighter.
Wish me luck...